Monday, January 10, 2011

Don't have to ask

I'm mostly independent. Yes, I'm spoiled - but the same guy who spent the first 20 years of my life making that happen also managed to teach me some very valuable lessons. Work ethic, responsibility, compassion...and how to have an opinion. He also taught me to take care of myself.

It's not that I'm unwilling to accept help, but I do like to know that I can handle a situation myself if necessary. I forgot that lesson for a long time. I thought I didn't need it anymore, once I had someone I could count on. That was a mistake; not counting on someone, but allowing myself to no longer count on myself.

So, I'm independent (or try to be). I pay my own bills, take care of my own house, make my own plans - and go places on my own, if I want. I come and go as I please and don't worry about anyone too much (except my kitties). When asked, I encourage any of my friends (especially my younger, single girl-friends) to live their lives the same way. Even if they get into a relationship, always make sure they can rely on themselves.

Still, there are times when I miss having someone to count on. Yes, I have friends and family that would do anything for me - if I asked. But sometimes it's nice to have someone who is going to walk through the door and just have what you need. Like crackers and ginger ale when you're sick. Someone who is comfortable enough in your life to say, "Don't worry about the garbage, I'll take it out," or "I'll get those boxes into the garage, you go rest."

Someone who you don't have to ask.

If you're lucky enough to have someone like that in your life - make sure you tell him thanks. Be grateful; be happy and appreciate him and what he brings to your life. I know he probably frustrates the hell out of you (believe me - I know) but don't forget that it all balances out. Don't forget how lucky you are.

(And stop complaining to those of us who have to handle all our nonsense alone. We're sick of hearing it.)


  1. I had (and continue to have) to learn to ask him and let him help. I'm not good at it because I was so used to doing everything on my own for a long long time.

    I'll send him over if you'd like once he gets here for good...