Saturday, June 20, 2015

Cancer season

I'm fascinated by Astrology. The rational side of my brain knows there probably isn't a ton of science behind it. The rest of me finds it to be a pretty accurate way to measure and predict moods and communication, and sometimes even events.

I came across this post about what it's like to love a Cancer (someone born between June 21 - July 22. My birthday is about three weeks into the Cancer month. I find I am (mostly) a typical Cancer (that whole "loves to cook" thing sorta passed me by - but I do love to eat, so there's that).

"Cancers continually find themselves in situations where they have to 'let go' but they have a hard time doing so.... They hold on through thick and thin but have a hard time recognizing when it’s time to finally cut the cord."

This is definitely a problem for me. I am notoriously bad at knowing when to say goodbye. I always want to give people just one more chance. Part of it is because I'm so afraid I'll walk away just when they are about to make whatever change I've been waiting for. I find myself not saying goodbye because I'm afraid my lack of patience will cause me to miss out on something great.

Recently, I have learned that while patience is a mature, positive virtue - sometimes, when your gut says it's time to say goodbye, ya just gotta listen. I've also learned that if you really don't want to listen to your gut, you should have one or two friends to whom you will listen. This is super-important.

"If we ever mistakenly forgot their birthday, [a Cancer will] remember the exact year and all the details surrounding precisely why [we forgot]. They will forgive but never forget... If there’s some debate on what to get them, I’d suggest a simple token of appreciation for all they do. That’s all these old souls really want."

It's also important to have friends who remember our birthday. It annoys us when they forget. (Also, my favorite color is purple, my shoe size is 6, and I've never met a sparkle I didn't like. Remember, I'm mostly a typical Cancer. This old soul likes cute stuff.)

"Sometimes it’s hard for the rest of us to let go of them too since we tend to feel so at home when they are with us."

This has historically been a huge problem for me. People get comfortable and they stick around long after they know they should say goodbye. If I'm distracted, I might just think they are still around because it's what they want. I'm getting better at recognizing the signs of someone who wants to leave - and also at being the one to say goodbye.

Guess I'm a little more adaptable than the typical Cancer, too.