Thursday, October 30, 2014

Apple CEO comes out, brings stupid people along

I honestly didn't know who Tim Cook was until this morning, when every news outlet I follow anywhere "broke the news" that he announced he is gay.

I'd much prefer to live in a world where men and women announcing their sexual orientation would not be news. But - apparently, a lot of people care.

Search "Tim Cook Android" on twitter, and you'll find tons of people who are either happy they already use Android devices, or who plan to switch because Apple's CEO came out.

Disturbing? You betcha. But now that those folks have come out (as being stupid), here's a thought....

CEOs from all tech giants should come out. As something, I don't care what. Gay, bi, lesbian, trans gender. Whatever you got.

All the ignorant biggots would have to cancel their plans and throw out their devices.

Then the rest of us can continue browing Buzzfeed lists and cat videos in peace.

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Work in progress

I have often said that everything happens for a reason. I actually do believe that things happen the way they're meant to, and we are right where we are supposed to be.

That doesn't mean stuff always makes sense. When I find myself in the middle of a difficult time, my first reaction is almost always, "Why?" I'd like to think I've been through enough and at some point, I deserve for stuff to just start working.

This weekend, I was supposed to be out of town for an annual Halloween party. It was canceled at the last minute, and I found myself with an incredibly empty schedule.

Since I was in town, I figured I'd go to church Saturday night. Our regular Pastor was not there. Instead, he had a church member share a personal message about control - and how we need to be willing to admit when things are out of our control, and hand them over to God.

I won't sit here and pretend to be all religious or try to convince anyone what his or her relationship with God should be. In my opinion, that's totally personal.

But that message is particularly relevant to my life right now. I needed to hear what she had to say. I am going through stuff over which I have zero control.... which has always been a challenge for me.

I have long been that person who thought everything was her fault - and her job to fix. Only child, divorced parents, abandonment issues... yadda, yadda, yadda. I realized several years ago it didn't matter why or how I got that way - I just needed to fix the problem.

It's not always easy. There are times when I still wonder if I've messed up, or I'm not good enough, or I don't deserve better.

But then I remember, that was once the way way I felt all the time. It wasn't something I wondered, either; I was sure I didn't deserve to be happy.

I also used to look at life's challenges as a reminder of how weak I was, and something from which I needed to hide. I figured I just deserved to be unhappy, so I let everything defeat me.

Now, when something is difficult - I meet it head on. I see it as a chance to prove to myself I can handle anything - even the stuff I never thought I could. It's a chance to grow - and maybe have something better than I ever thought possible.

I'd call that progress.

Saturday, October 4, 2014

Give it a try

I've been told I am a very pragmatic person. Even as a kid, I always wanted to understand "why." If the why didn't make sense, I didn't subscribe to the lesson. "Because I said so" never really worked with me (which, you can imagine, led to the occasional conflict).

As a young adult, I left that behind for a while. I started chasing goals and dreams that belonged to others, because it was what I thought I was "supposed to do." I figured that when I finally checked all of the items off the list, I'd see what all the fuss was about.

I did not.

Now that I am (*ahem*) older, I've come full circle. I'm back to searching out "whys" that make sense. "Because everyone else is doing it" doesn't cut it anymore.

My choices don't always make sense to the people around me. Sometimes I think my friends and family (especially my family) wonder if I haven't let things get completely off-track. 

Those who know me best, know better. I am not ignoring what I know, and what I have learned. Pride, reason, and experience are all still a part of every choice I make.

I'm just finally letting my heart have a say, too.

Friday, October 3, 2014

Moving target

Ever find yourself thinking, "Why me?" Or, maybe even worse, "Why not me?"

We've all been there. You look around and it seems like everyone else has their stuff together. Right job, right relationship, right home - whatever. Then you look back at yourself and you think, "What happened here? Why don't I have that?"

I think that feeling is normal - sometimes. The trick (I think) is to get some perspective before you're overcome with the overwhelming anxiety that can follow.

Happiness isn't really a destination; it's more like a moving target. Sometimes you're right in line with exactly what you want or where you want to be. Other times, you think you know - only to find that it isn't all you expected. So, you have to pivot, and adjust your aim.

If you're anything like me, you probably feel like you're always pivoting. Maybe you have found yourself wondering why you can't just have what you want?

I like to think that maybe I haven't hit my target because I've been aiming too low. I suppose it would be easy to think that I somehow don't deserve to just be happy like everyone else. But I prefer to think that my happiness isn't simple like everyone else.

Mine will be absolutely amazing.

So what's a lady to do while she waits, and sets her sights on amazing?

Think about all you have. Focus on all the happiness you've already found, and how much better things are than they could have been.

Remember -  your goal isn't to reach the end, anyway. Three months from now, "happy" could look completely different than today's target. That's not a problem for those of us who know how to adjust - just means there's always something to look forward to.

So maybe those of us who are always pivoting are the ones who have it right.