Sunday, September 26, 2010

Balancing Act

The other day, I asked my tweeps what was the best, and worst, dating advice they'd received. Several responded, but one response really stood out. 

One of my tweeps said the best advice he'd received was to just be himself. He also said that was the worst advice. He was being funny, but his answer got me thinking. 

How often are we our own worst enemy when it comes to meeting people (dates, new friends, coworkers, etc.)? Sure, we have to be ourselves because we want the other person to really know us - but is it possible to be too honest? Should we hide certain things at first, and gradually let the wall down - or should we be out there all the way from the word go?

I was reading this article the other day about the best, and worst, date conversations. If you take your cues from this article - some things really are too personal when you're just getting to know someone. The thing is, I've had conversations with would-be dates about some of these topics. It wasn't pleasant - but it was worth knowing up front that we weren't a good match.

If you're meeting people online, there's always the big question of what you should say in your profile. Keep it positive, interesting and try to stand out. That all makes sense. But is there such a thing as too much information?

I couldn't find an answer to that question. I found a good article on phrases you should avoid. So, maybe if you're a negative, ex-bashing mis-speller - you need a little less you? I also found a good article on lies commonly told in online profiles. Here's what I think: if you're 5'5" - say so. If the profile works the way you want, he or she is going to figure it out soon enough, anyway.

When I meet anyone, the last thing I want is to feel is that I can't relate to them. Whether it's a date, or a new friend, if you're flawless, I'm going to wonder what we might possibly have to talk about? I like real people; flaws and all. Imperfections make us beautiful.

My take? Balance. Figure out what is the best, and worst, you have to offer. Show a little of both, but not all. Give a hint of who you really are. Maybe the key to meeting the right people is finding the ones who care enough to find out more.


  1. Opinions are like fine cuisine. Both are repulsive when vomited. God gave you two ears and one mouth. Do you think he meant you to listen more than speak?

  2. I would agree with you. I think God intended for us to listen as least twice as much as we speak. I do my best to only share my opinion when asked, and to be careful when I share. I'm not always perfect. I guess that's one of my flaws.