Little things

I feel like I am constantly surrounded by negative. Whether it's from the news, or my social media feeds, or just inside my own head, there's so much that brings me down. Once the negative thoughts are in my head, it's very hard for me to break free. 

So I'm happy when I'm able to take some pleasure in appreciating the little things.

• My office building lost power today - so I worked from home and took lunch at my pool. 
• My friend just picked up his new puppy, who he has named Lionel Ritchie. How cute is that?!
• I received a lovely text from my Little's mom the other day, thanking me for all I do (I really don't think I do very much, but it was very nice to hear). 
• I am able to hide political posts, and have been doing so successfully - to the point where I got all the way through yesterday without knowing it was Donald Trump's birthday.
• For every political thing my friends like or share, there are at least three wonderful stories from other friends - like this one.
• I am going on vacation again with my favorite person - to a new ballpark!

Blog challenge - smells and technology

I love to write but lately, I haven't had a ton of time. When I do, I'm often uninspired. When I am, it's usually political, and who wants to go there?

I came across a 30-day challenge I haven't seen before, and thought I'd give it a shot. Of course I found it late in the day on November 1, so I'm already behind.

The first challenge? A smell I'm grateful for today. A smell? Really? 

I'm going with the smell of the new evergreen candle I bought over the weekend. Evergreen is my favorite smell, next to lilac. I'll burn evergreen candles all year if I have the chance. The problem is the really good smelling candles are expensive, and I go through them quickly because I warm candles rather than burn (kitties and open flames don't mix well). 

I found this candle on sale at Kohl's and I had Kohl's cash - for which I'm also grateful.

The second challenge? Technology for which I am grateful. 

I'm someone who likes convenience and, in general, am happy to pay for more of it in my life. My most long-standing relationship, outside of the one with my cat, is with my phone. Aside from that, I also love my DVR, which allows me to have actual relationships with actual people, and still not miss out on my relationships with my favorite TV characters. 

Days 1 and 2 - done.

Phew

I'm house-sitting and watching Chrissy's kids while she and her new husband honeymoon somewhere in Europe. I just have the kids Wednesday and Thursday night, and she did everything she could possibly do ahead of time, to make my life easier.

I was quite honored she asked me to watch the kids. I'm not exactly the first person* people think of when they think about child care (shocking, I know).

Everything was freaking fine, until the three of us got in the car to leave for school - and my car wouldn't start. We pivoted quickly, moved to Chrissy's SUV, and got them to school only 4 minutes later than planned. I was impressed, considering we had to move their booster seats, find keys, and I had to figure out the new car.

As I waited for my battery to be replaced, it occurred to me this could have been much more stressful. So I'm quite grateful that...

• We slept at their house and not mine, where a second car would not have been so readily available.

• My friend's kids are nosy and look where they shouldn't, which is why they knew where to find the keys for that vehicle.

• My car died while everyone was safely in the house.

• I, at some point, thought to put my roadside assistance service membership on auto-renewal, so I had someone to call for help.

• That I came to the same place to replace my battery, and they keep good records. My battery was under warranty.

Phew.

*I wasn't her first thought, either. I am very touched to even be on the list.

Before and after

By now you know I sold my house and moved. What you may not know is that I sold my house to a dear friend of mine and that guy she married.*

I adore them, of course, and I am so very happy to see them happy.

Of course, we're all friends on Facebook, Twitter, and I'm not sure where else. I see the pictures and status updates, and comments from their friends and family, as they post about their renovation efforts. I even helped them move some stuff into the house (though I stopped short of carrying boxes of hardwood flooring).

The other day, a mutual friend asked how I was handling that - seeing a complete dismantle of the house I called home for so long. Even X asked how I would ever be able to go back, and see how the work and memories I made have been changed.

I'll admit - at first it was strange. It felt weird, seeing pictures of my house on someone else's timeline, labeled "before." I thought back to when X and I moved in, and took the same photos (in the BF - Before Facebook - era). Except, we called them "after."

But the truth is - the house hadn't been my "home" for a long time. I bought it as one half of a couple, many years ago. The projects and renovations we did were done as a team. Sure, I bought the house after the divorce, and it was mine. Yes, I continued to make memories - Chrissy and her kids lived there for a while, there were parties and house guests and little changes.

But the house was never what I imagined back in 2003, when I was full of ideas and hope for what we could make of it. That all stopped the day X left. That was the day the house stopped being my home.

There is an episode of How I Met Your Mother in which Ted gives up his long-time apartment. In the letter he writes to his friends, he says he thought the apartment had been haunted by memories of a love he lost, but he finally realized that it was really haunted by him. He had stopped living and was standing still in time, and the apartment was keeping him from moving on.

At some point, the house did the same for me. It allowed me to stay stuck in a place where I didn't have to deal with the reality that my life is different - and it was time to move on. The house was my excuse, my refuge from the scariest thing we all face now and then.

Change.

The truth is, home is a fluid concept. When we're young, it's with our parents. At some point, it becomes that first apartment where we spread our wings for the first time. Eventually, if we're lucky, it becomes that house we buy right when we think we're settling down.

It'd be nice if that was the last home for everyone. For some, it will be, and I think that's simply wonderful.

For me, home has changed again. I'm grateful that I owned a house, and saw some of those hopes and dreams come true.

I'm also grateful that I was able to own the home on my own for a bit, that it was there to help my friends when needed, and to shelter me while I healed.

Now I'm grateful it will be there for someone else's hopes and dreams - and I actually feel quite honored I'll get to witness those dreams come true.

After years of haunting, I'm finally finding my new home - and my after has become someone else's before.

*Make sure to visit their sites for pictures of the renovations and other musings on life, and home ownership.

Moving up

I'll admit - I was surprised by the overwhelming emotion I felt (both the amount and variety), making my move from homeowner back to apartment renter. I haven't written about it because I'm still not quite sure what I want to say.

But, here's something I know....

Today is the sort of day I am very happy not to own a house, or any of the work or responsibility one brings.

My 25 percent

In church this weekend, Pastor discussed celebrating and enjoying life. He talked about how much time we spend in pursuit of material things, or trying to please others.

He mentioned reading once that the people you meet in life can be broken down into four categories:

• 25% will not like you.
• 25% will not like you - but could be convinced to like you.
• 25% will like you - but could be convinced not to.
• 25% will like you - no matter what.

Those are the people you need in your life, and you should not be concerned with pleasing anyone else.

I am so grateful for my 25%. I am blessed to have people who accept me, faults and all. People I know I can count on, without even having to ask.

Knowing who your 25% are not only makes life a little happier - it makes dealing with the other 75% much easier.

Grateful for my bed

So... I have a new full time job. I started on April 1. It was a tough decision because as unhappy as I was with some parts of my old job (which I had for almost 14 years), I had a lot of great perks. I gave those up in favor of an opportunity to start over. I never thought I'd be starting over at nearly-40 - but it seemed like the right decision.

But starting over means some training...which means some travel. As I type, I'm sitting in a hotel room, while it snows outside in Syracuse, NY. Blech.

This is the fifth night in the last two weeks I've spent away from home. I miss my bed, and being able to get my errands done, and I really, really miss my cat.

I'm grateful for this new opportunity. I'm really grateful that it's with a great company, and that my new coworkers all seem very cool. I'm grateful that I finally had the courage to give up those perks and try something new, that will be better for my future.

But - I'll be super grateful when I can sleep in my own bed.

I love Wednesdays

Saturday is my favorite day. It's the one day every week where I not only don't have to rush out of the house (usually), I also don't have to worry about rushing out the next morning.

Friday is my favorite work day because I can dress casual, many of my clients are off, and I'm staring down the barrel of Saturday.

But Wednesdays? I love Wednesdays. I've usually gained some momentum on my work week, and am doing OK. But it also feels so much closer to the weekend. Once you survive Wednesday, it's just Thursday, which is practically Friday - which is ptactically the weekend.

Plus - Wednesday is Shemar Moore Day!

(Criminal Minds, 9 pm, CBS)

An app for that

I am mostly grateful that I have a job. It's actually a good job - I am well-paid, have more vacation time than I can actually use, flexibility, and a pretty short work week. Mostly, I can't complain.

But I may still download this app - just in case.

Caffeinated gratitude

Today is brought to you by caffeine, tears, and sheer will to live.

I'm thankful for the caffeine. Since I get mine via Mountain Dew, I'm especially grateful that the Panera closest to my office has a drive-thru open for breakfast hours.

Carry on.

Random gratitude

I didn't post yesterday... but that doesn't mean I wasn't grateful.

• I'm quite grateful for apartment finder sites and apps that help me research potential new homes for Joe and me.

• I'm grateful that there are places where I can bring Joe to live. Smuggling him in would be a pain in the you-know-what.

• I'm grateful that I love Joe enough that I wouldn't even consider living somewhere he couldn't. Everyone deserves that kind of love in their life.

• I am eternally and hopelessly grateful to my parents for the fact that I have no siblings. Seriously - how do you people put up with all that BS?

• I'm grateful it's no longer December, the holidays are over, and we can get back to task of just being.

• I'm grateful I'm not as dumb as some people. Seriously, have they never experienced cold weather?!

Selfie Olympics

I'm thankful everyday for Buzzfeed. They bring endless distraction and fun into my day.

Today, I'm also grateful I've never been caught on the internet in any of these poses.

Snow days

I promised to share a little gratitude every day.

It is not often you'll hear me talk about work; and you'll almost never hear me say I'm grateful for my job.

But, as the snow continues to fall, I have to say, I am quite grateful my manager allows me to work from home when the weather is bad.

I don't actually mind driving in snow - but I suck at walking in the stuff. Even the short walk from the office parking lot is bad for me.

Then there's the shoveling. Sure, I have a snow-removal service - but what if I get home and they haven't plowed? Then I have to shovel my way into my driveway.

I'd just as soon stay home.

A year of gratitude

Baking Suit shared this post today, and it got me thinking...

I can absolutely find something in every day to make me grateful. How wonderful would it be to document all that gratitude? The only problem - I don't take that many photos.

Even so, I think I probably run across images every day that mean something to me. Or, stories worth sharing. If a story makes my day better, perhaps it could do the same for someone else.

Definitely worth sharing.

The first of my 365 Grateful project....

Friends who get me. They are rare and special.