Thursday, December 23, 2010

For the Rest of Us

Always celebrate the Miracle of Festivus!!

Sometimes, you just need a break from the shopping and baking and wrapping and spending and lugging and smiling and caroling and.... whoa....!! Please excuse me while my grievances air....

  • It sucks that this is my busiest month at work. While everyone else is going from one holiday party to the next, I'm stuck working through lunch, and usually long past quitting time. I feel like Bob Cratchet. Could please pass me some coal?
  • It also sucks to be broke this time of year. The one thing I could do that would be fun is to buy gifts for others, without a budget. Ah well, there's always next year. 
  • You know when you walk through a door and you hold it for the person behind you? I hate when they yank the door away from me. I'm holding on to that, darn it - and I have bad knees. Why don't you just swipe the leg, and be done with it?
  • I don't even like to bake - or cook, for that matter. But I do like to eat. This is tough this time of year, because I've determined I need to go on a diet - STAT. 
  • I'll never understand why so many places salt their sidewalk - but ignore their parking lot. I walk as much in the lot as the sidewalk (if not more). I could use a little help (bad knees, remember?). 
  • I love decorating to my own taste and making quick get-aways. But, it would sometimes be really nice to have an "other" this time of year. Plus, I was really hoping to have a place to wear those shoes that were on my list

Okay - those are my grievances. Feel free to air yours below. We all need to vent sometimes. 


  1. Ok, in keeping with the Airing of Grievances tradition, and in support of my friend Sue, here are my grievances:

    1. When following a thread on a social media site, keep to the topic at hand. For example, if a person is talking about their work, don't interject with a comment such as, "Hey how is your mom? Have her call me." It's just annoying. Learn how to post, damn it!

    2. I realize that social media sites are for fostering social connections, but if you have 1,000+ friends on Facebook and don't connect with any of them in person EVER, you might just be a phony. Just sayin'. How about walking away from the computer and meeting some people in real life, eh?

    3. Pregnant women need comfortable yet fashion-forward footwear. I realize that stilettos aren't the safest shoes at the moment, but I still want to be sexy, damn it. How's a MILF supposed to get her start, anyway?

    4. When you cut your toenails (yes, I mean you), please discard them. DO NOT leave them piled on our bedroom floor. Since I'm the one that makes the bed, I don't really appreciate getting jabbed by your grooming leftovers.

    5. If you're on the bus and see a pregnant woman, give her your seat. This is just common sense, and it's gentlemanly. Being pregnant on a bus feels like surfing, and is uncomfortable. Chuckling at said bus-surfing prego chick is like school in summertime----NO CLASS.

    That's it for now. When I think of more, I'll be back.

  2. Nice list. I'm totally with you on number 1 - that drives me nuts.

    By the way, how's G? ;)