To the guy who sat behind me in church last week... Stop yelling. I came here to listen to the Pastor and the Worship Team, not you.
To the guy who sat next to me in church last week... Move over! We're not on a date. Get out of my personal space.
To the guy who sat next to me (on the other side) in church last week... Not everyone should sing.
To the usher who sees me at church every week... Yes, I'm here alone - again. Don't punish me by asking me to climb over 8 people to fill that single seat. Also, stop trying to seat me next to single men.
To my Pastor... You clearly believe God is all-powerful and all-knowing. Created the universe, performs miracles, etc. Are you absolutely certain He can't hear me when I'm sitting down?
To the couple who exited just ahead of me... The doorway is the least helpful place for you to stop and argue about which door you should use.
To God... I went inside while it was 90s and muggy. I came out to 70s and beautiful. Perfect baseball weather. Thanks for the rain!